This past Saturday I headed up the road to Roanoke’s Explore Park for race #2 in the Mountain Junkies RNUTS series. It was a crisp, clear morning and I was feeling excited for the race. Such a nice change from all of the rain and gloomy weather we have had lately. I arrived about 15 minutes prior to the pre-race meeting. That was plenty of time to park, hit the restroom, and get my race bib and shirt before the meeting. I love small races.

Following the pre-race meeting, we walked down to the starting area. I was happy to find a campground has been installed (is that the right word?) since the last time I was at the park. That meant we didn’t have to scramble up a slick, muddy grassy hill right at the beginning of the run. Sweet. Just after 9 AM, the 10K runners were off to the races. The 5K would follow 10 minutes later.

We had a short stretch along paved and gravel roads before heading into the woods onto the singletrack. I felt good and tried to keep my pace comfortable. There’s a lot of downhill during the first mile. I couldn’t run quite as fast as I wanted, because the trail was muddy and leaf-covered. But I gotta tell you, I was having a blast.

We encountered the first true hill of the day during the second mile. The course did a small loop here, so we got to see some runners ahead of us. We looped around at the top of the hill and headed back downhill for a short, flat stretch along the river. As I approached mile 2, the blazing fast leaders of the 5K began catching me. At this point, we were on a wide path and it was easy for them to pass. We headed up another short, steep hill and hit the first water stop just after mile 2. I grabbed a quick drink of water and kept rolling.

We had a brief respite before the real fun began. As we made our way to mile 3, we climbed a hill lovingly nicknamed “vomit hill.” It is tough. In the past I have always walked this entire hill. But this year I made a goal to alternate running and walking – so I took 20 steps of running and 20 steps of walking until I made it to the top.

From here, we were back on the paved road where we started. We ran by the finish line, where the 5K runners split off. The 10K runners continued onto a 3 mile lollipop loop. I have never run this 10K, but I knew the course (in 2015 I dropped mid-race to the 5K due to snowy conditions). I worried that I would pass the 5K finish line at the halfway point, and want to be done. But I’m happy to report I was in good spirits and excited to keep going.

I enjoyed the second half of the course. We started out with a long downhill (which was muddy and slick), crossed a bridge (which was muddy and slick), and started making our way up a long hill on the other side (which… was muddy and slick). The 10K leaders were coming back by at this point, on their way to the finish. Everyone handled the two-way traffic on the singletrack well, and we all exchanged cheers with each other on the way by.

There were some more challenging hills along the way. Some of the downhills through this section were also challenging, as they were leaf-covered, muddy, and had large rocks. Some of the mud was even ankle deep! But before I knew it, I passed mile 5 and was on the final mile of the race. My legs were definitely starting to feel tired now, but that’s to be expected towards the end of a race.

That last steep uphill to the finish was tough and I tried to hike and run it at a good pace. I finished in 1:16:38. My goals going into this race were to run strong and solid, and to finish in under 1:20. Overall, I was happy with my race. I felt good both physically and mentally, and I feel like I’m regaining a bit of my mojo after last week.

After the race I enjoyed the always fabulous Mountain Junkies post-race feast: bagels, veggies and hummus, bananas, crackers, and homemade baked goods.

I spent some time catching up with several friends and watched some of the awards before hitting the road to head home. Next on the schedule is my first Fat Ass-style race next weekend and then my favorite RNUTS Race – Montvale 10 Miler!

I had a long run that did NOT go as planned on Sunday. I think there were a number of factors at play. But at the heart of the matter, I ultimately psyched myself out. I debated on whether or not to even write this post. I don’t want it to come across as me looking for sympathy or seeking attention. But ultimately, I decided it would be good to share. If nothing else, it might be helpful for me to come back and read it someday.

I’m trying not to dwell on what happened. At the end of the day it was a long run that’s very early in my training cycle. It wasn’t a race I had put in months of work for, nor was it a peak training run for a big race. But yet I’m still dwelling on it a little bit.

So this run. It was a point to point run on the Appalachian Trail from route 311 to route 220. It’s approximately 20 miles with over 4,000 feet of elevation gain. It was going to be a big run for me – definitely one of the toughest I’ve ever tackled. I knew it would be a big challenge. And it’s good to be realistic about that type of run. But for some reason I got really worked up leading up to it. I dwelled on the run in the days leading up to it, and even had a nightmare about the run two nights before hand. I was more nervous about this run than I have been about most of the races I’ve ever done. The night before the run I didn’t fall asleep until well after 2 AM. A short three hours later, my alarm was going off.

I wasn’t feeling great when I got up. I think a big part of it was nerves, but there were also some other factors at play that morning that just had me feeling not myself. I ate a little bit of food before we left, and attempted to eat some more as Barry and I made the drive up to Roanoke. However, I didn’t manage more than one Belvita biscuit.

We arrived in Roanoke about 5 minutes before the rest of the group. Once they arrived, we got a quick picture in the parking lot and then it was go time. We had a big group of at least 15 runners. It was kind of exciting, but I also felt really intimidated. I think I was feeling a bit of ‘imposter syndrome’ like I did not belong and was not good enough to run with these people. Definitely not the way to start out a challenging run.

The run started with a 3.5 to 4 mile, ~1200 foot climb up to McAfee Knob. I think the group broke up into about four sub-groups, and I was hanging with the second to last group. We alternated hiking and running and I was still so nervous, but feeling okay. However, about halfway up my energy started plummeting. I fell behind the group I was with and was soon passed by the last group as well. It wasn’t long before they were completely out of sight and it was just Barry and me.

My pace continued to slow as the terrain got steeper towards the top and I tried to eat some Honey Stinger chews and sip on water to try and help my energy levels. But as the climb became more challenging, my heart seemed to race faster and faster and I started feeling dizzy and nauseous. That, combined with not keeping up with the group, was demoralizing. Despite being encouraged days before by several of my running friends that I could do this run, I was doubting myself.

I’m not sure how much of the way I was feeling physically was manifested by how I was feeling mentally. But Sunday was definitely a lesson in the power of your mind, and how it can take over in a very negative way if you let it. Barry and I joined the group at the top (Being greeted by someone saying “oh, I forgot there were two more.” Yea, that’s how far behind I was. Blah). It was really foggy up top, so there wasn’t any view. We still got a group picture.

At this point, I knew my day was over. How could I continue with this group when I couldn’t even hang on the easier climb of the day? It wouldn’t have been fair for me to expect someone to wait an hour (or more) on me to finish at the other end (since this was a point to point run, I’d need a ride back to my car). Barry was already planning on doing an out-and-back run, so I decided to join him. I let my friend Kim know that I was bailing on the run. It was chaotic on top of McAfee, as it was windy and cold and the group was scrambling to get back on the move. It felt like everyone was everywhere, but I think she got the message that I was done.

Barry and I continued down the trail, with loose plans of going out another 4 miles and then turning around, which would give us about 16 miles total for the day. However, less than a mile past McAfee it was obvious that I was just so done. I felt awful, I was still dizzy, and I had no energy and no power. The most frustrating part is my legs actually felt good. It was just the rest of me, my head included, that had given up. So we ended up turning around at 5 miles, to make 10 miles total for the day.

As we went back across McAfee Knob, it was still foggy. It was also windy and snowing. We were expecting high winds (40-50 mph) later that day, and it seemed like they were already moving in at the higher elevation. On the way back, some of the fog lifted and we did at least get a few nice views along the trail as we made our way down the mountain.

We ended the day with just under 10 miles and ~2300 feet of elevation gain. Still a tough run, but not what I had planned on doing. I’m disappointed in myself, and I guess I feel kind of self-conscious about the whole thing. My confidence took a big hit. I will try again someday, but it is going to take awhile for me to work up the courage to go out with that group again. Which stinks, because they were an awesome group.

There’s a lot to learn from Sunday. I was reminded that when you take big risks and push the limits, you’re bound to fail sometimes. It’s all part of the process. But ultimately, on this day, I think my mind failed me. Mental toughness is a big part of running ultramarathons, and clearly I need some work in that department.

On the way home, Barry and I stopped at Panda Express so I could drown my sorrows in orange chicken. Ironically, my fortune cookie read “You will display great bravery when faced with adversity.” Hah! Not on that day. But I’m working on it.

The Frozen Toe 10K almost didn’t happen. The race usually takes place on the Chestnut Ridge Loop, which is entirely on National Park Service land. Due to the government shutdown, the NPS isn’t currently honoring special use permits. I’d guess a lot of races would have thrown in the towel. But that’s not how Josh and Gina of Mountain Junkies operate. They were able to scramble and work with Hollins University and Roanoke City Parks & Rec to pull something together. And the Frozen Toe 2.0 was born.

The race would now be an out and back on the Tinker Creek Greenway to the Carvins Cove boat dock. It was a tough course that took us up over a mountain (and then back), but it was gorgeous!

There was a big winter storm on the way, but Saturday morning was crisp and clear. I made the quick drive up to Hollins University in Roanoke, found parking and headed to the gym to pick up my race bib. This year we got sweet zip up hoodies with the race!

I mingled in the gym, caught up with a few friends, and waited for the pre-race briefing. From there it was time to head over to the trail head for the start of the race.

I always love that feeling of pent up energy in the crowd at the start line before a race. Standing there waiting to run, I was so excited to finally be kicking off the 2019 RNUTS series and to be healthy and ready to tackle this year.

A little after 9 AM, we were off and running. We started out down a wide dirt and gravel path, went through a tunnel under the interstate, and then ran some small rolling hills through a field. It gave the race field a chance to spread out a bit before we hit the single track in the woods. I felt strong through this early section and I was happy the gradual uphill didn’t seem to be wearing me down.

After the first mile, we started our climb up the mountain, which lasted about 7 tenths of a mile. I mostly hiked, but also threw in some running when I could.

When I got to the top I was rewarded with a gorgeous view of the Cove and a steep downhill. On my way down, the race leaders started coming back. Handling the two way traffic on the narrow single track that was cut into the side of the mountain was challenging, but I made sure to yield to the faster runners.

I love the trail running community. As a whole, it’s a very friendly and supportive place. So despite the challenge of handling two way traffic on a narrow trail, all of the runners were yelling “good job” and “keep it up” and “way to go [enter friend’s name here]” as they passed each other. I cruised down the trail and before I knew it, I arrived at the halfway point at the boat dock. There was a water stop here, so I drank some water and a cup of some funny tasting Scratch (I honestly have NO clue what flavor it was). And then it was time to climb back up the mountain. Again, I hiked a lot of it. But I found that this climb wasn’t quite as challenging as the first, so I was able to run a bunch, too. I feel like I’m getting stronger and more confident on trails.

Once at the top, it was time to run down the steep and somewhat technical downhill on the other side. I stayed on my feet and made it down unscathed.

From there we only had about a mile to go and I started picking up the pace. I was tired, but the last mile was very runnable and I wasn’t going to stop. I kind of wish I had at least acknowledged the photographer, though. 😛

I finished in 1:09:57, which was faster than I expected. I wasn’t sure how I would handle the two climbs, since I haven’t been running hillier terrain lately, other than last week’s Pandapas run.

With the course change, the race ended up being about 5.7 miles, aka the “Frozen Toe 9K.” The joke was made that although the government didn’t shut down our race, they did steal a K from it, ha! But I think everyone was just really grateful to Josh and Gina and all those who put in some hard work to make this race happen.

It started to snow on my way home, and just two hours after I finished the race, it looked like this outside:

I couldn’t resist heading out for a second run to play in the snow, so I snuck in a few more miles.

Next up: Explore Your Limits 10K in early March!

Pandapas Pond and the Poverty Creek trail system in Blacksburg is one of my favorite places to run. It’s got miles of trails nestled in the George Washington & Jefferson National Forests, and it’s definitely one of my happy places. The weather was less than ideal this weekend, but I hadn’t run at Pandapas in over 6 months, so I was eager to get in a run there. Plus, I had good company, or an unsuspecting victim, in Kim.

Kim and I started our run from Hertigate Park in Blacksburg, on the backside of Brush Mountain. Since the partial government shutdown is ongoing, I figured the main entrance to Pandapas was probably closed. This meant we started our day climbing about 700 feet over 1.8 miles or so up the Gateway/Old Farm trail.

It was a rainy, blustery morning with 20+ mph winds. Probably not the best conditions, but you have to take what the day gives you. There has been a lot of rain lately, but the trails we were on drain well and were in good condition. The only sloppy section was at the very beginning of our run. Spoiler alert: the only time either one of us fell was when I slipped on that grass on the way back.

The rain petered out early in our run, and we were well protected from the wind during our climb up the mountain. Once we got to the top and were running along the ridge line, we were blasted with high winds and pelting sleet. It was literally hurting my face.

After half mile of running along the ridge, the trail dumped us out onto the fire road. It felt a bit safer here on the wide road, versus the singletrack trail, because I felt like it gave us more room to dodge a falling tree. Those tall trees at the top of the mountain were swaying big time.

It was easy running down the fire road, which has big rolling hills but a net downhill. Soon, we hit our turnaround at 3 miles and it was time to head back up the mountain to retrace our to Heritage Park. We were working hard, but running with Kim made the miles really fly by. The sun even peeked out during the last mile and a half.

Sure enough, right at the end of our run as we arrived back at the sloppy grassy area, my feet slipped out from under me and I found myself on my backside in the mud. I guess it wouldn’t be a trail run without at least one fall!

I need to tell you something. I’m facing the end of an era and I don’t really know what I’m going to do with myself. Yes, I’m being a bit dramatic. But if you’re a runner or if you’ve been around one, you’ll get it.

In case you missed it – Pearl Izumi dissolved their running line in 2016. Finally, the end of my Pearl Izumi era has arrived. I hoarded a few pairs of my favorite shoes in the ensuing months. But this is it. I’m about to start running in my last pair of PI trail running shoes and there’s no more out there. I know there will be more shoes to come and I’ll eventually find a new love. But for now, I’m in mourning.

Second, I’m going to tell you about the beginning of a new era. At least that’s what I’m calling this one. I’m not much on New Years resolutions. But I do try and have some short and long term goals in mind for the year. One of my goals this year is to acknowledge something that made me happy each day in 2019. I have a journal that I’m going to write them down in. My idea is that it can simply be something short and sweet, something in depth, or even a number of things for the day. Sometimes we get bogged down with negative things both in our personal lives and in the world around us. I think this will be a great way to keep a positive outlook on life.

I’ll close this by bringing it back around to running. Things have been going smoothly for me. I’ve been getting some good consistency back since resuming running in May 2018, after recovering from a tibial stress fracture. I ran two ultramarathons at the end of 2018 and I finally feel ready to tackle some new challenges this year. The big one will be the Yeti 50 Miler on June 1. I also have a lot of other exciting races on my schedule between now and then and I can’t wait!

There’s a lot of training between now and the Yeti. Good thing I’m a big fan of hard work!